What is the Emotional Freedom Technique?

The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), also known as tapping, is a mental health technique where the user will tap on acupressure points on their own body in order to calm the amygdala, the fear center of the brain, that activates the flight, fight and freeze response. We have all experienced this response. It’s when you jump back when you see a snake in front of you. It’s when you jerk your steering wheel on the highway when someone is about to merge into you. This response is needed for human survival. The problem arises when this response is activated by a negative emotional event.

There are ten primary points that are used with EFT:

·       Top of the head

·       Eyebrow, at the bridge of the nose

·       Side of the eye on the bony socket

·       Under the eye on the bony socket

·       Upper lip (Philtrum)

·       Lower lip, in the grove above the chin

·       Collar bone, near the base of the throat

·       Under the arm, below the armpit on the rib cage

·       Inner wrist, where you would check your pulse

·       Side of the hand, below the pinky on the fleshy part of the palm – called the karate chop point

The significance of these points is that they correlate with the 14 meridians of the body (some points are connected with more than one meridian) per Chinese medicine and acupuncture. According to Chinese medicine, the tapping allows for the Chi (emotional energy) to move more freely through the body and bring a sense of relief and calm to the mind and body.

So, if you have ever gotten acupuncture before, you have experienced that sense of relief of tension in your body. That same effect is happening when you are tapping on yourself.

For some of you reading this you might be thinking, “This sounds like new age bullshit”. And I hear you. There is a component of woo-woo to tapping. But what is the harm in giving it a try? I’m serious, try it right now. Start tapping on the points for a few moments. Go from point to point until you cycle through all ten at least two or three times. The order doesn’t matter. What side of the body or which hand you use does not matter. The number of taps per point doesn’t matter. EFT is very forgiving that way. I’m serious, try it. I’m not going anywhere (cue Jeopardy Music).

So, how do you feel? A little more relaxed? Slightly calmer? All from just tapping on yourself.

Benefits of the Emotional freedom technique

The short-term benefits include an immediate reduction in whatever emotion you are feeling:

·       Are you feeling anxious or fearful?

·       Are you feeling sad or dealing with depression?

·       Do you get easily angry and lose your temper?

·       Do you feel guilt or shame about your past actions?

EFT can help alleviate these emotions immediately from tapping on yourself. For some people the relief can occur in just a few rounds of tapping through the ten points. For others who are experiencing a more profound emotion such as a panic attack or severe depression, it may take longer for the emotion to pass. 5-15 minutes depending how severe the emotion is.

So, if you’re reading this right now and you just feeling awful, start tapping, and tap quickly through the points. Stay at each point for only a few moments before moving onto the next point. The faster you cycle through the points the faster it will bring you relief.

The long term benefits include a permanent resolution of past trauma and self-limiting beliefs. I want to repeat that because it is so amazing – A PERMANENT RESOLUTION of past trauma and self-limiting beliefs.

Now some of you might be saying, this is bullshit. How could tapping on yourself relieve past trauma? I’m happy to explain:

·       Tapping invokes a calming effect on your nervous system and emotions, which calms the amygdala, the fear center of the mind.

·       This relief allows your frontal lobe (your rational mind) to reactivate and process what you are feeling.

·       With guidance from a practitioner, the source of the negative emotions will begin to present itself typically through memories.

·       The memories are then emotionally processed until any emotions associated with the memory are released.

·       Once all the emotions are released from the memory, it will no longer influence your present-day actions and feelings, allowing you to respond appropriately in the present, instead of reacting due to the past.

When I first was exposed to EFT, I was very skeptical. That changed when I was in the client seat working with a practitioner who had incorporated EFT into her practice.

How EFT Helped Me

I was a very confused closeted nerdy gay boy growing up in the 90s. Back in the 90s, calling anything that was dumb or lame “gay” was in vogue. So, my love for Pokémon cards, Star Trek & X-Men made me a target of bullying for much of my middle school and early high school years. On top of that, the people that made fun of me and called me gay didn’t know that they were pushing a button of insecurity within me, which made the situation much worse emotionally.

Fast forward to college. Things started to improve. I started to make friends who accepted who I was. But the bullying returned in a particular vicious night. Some horrible words were said to me that once again hit a button that they didn’t know was there: “No one likes you” “Can’t you take the hint that no one wants you around” etc.

This led to me nearly attempting suicide. I was wandering the campus at 2 AM debating, do I kill myself or do I commit myself? I ended up doing neither. I swallowed that nuclear bomb of emotions alone in my dorm room. It is truly amazing how strong the instinct for survival is within each of us that my mind what able to shove those emotions away into my subconscious.

Fast forward again to 2018. I had come out, married, with a home and a cat. Living life like a gay Norman Rockwell painting. But I was still carrying all that pain and trauma with me. The mind is strong but its capacity isn’t infinite. Pent up emotions need to escape one way or another and it did so with me in the form of a panic attack.

The panic attack took away my ability to compartmentalize my emotions. Now everything was coming out. Like an overstuffed fridge filled with rotten food, just spilling all over the floor. The panic attack also spawned a new symptom – agoraphobia. For about a month I did not leave my house. I stayed mostly in one room in my house. I was just to petrified to go outside and be judge by people.

Luckily, I connected with a practitioner that used EFT in her practice. We started over the phone first before I was able to meet in her office. The panic attacks were gone after a month, along with the agoraphobia.

I started to unpack these boxes of old emotions that I locked away in my mind. One at a time, piece by piece. All the while, feeling better. Getting mentally stronger. Having more resilience and confidence.

I was able to let go of the fear from the bullying. Let go of the pain from the near suicide attempt. I learned to accept who I was back then and who I am today. So much so, that I can talk about it openly here with you. With no fear of judgment. No embarrassment. No emotion. It is like telling you what I ate for breakfast this morning. It’s not a big deal anymore. I don’t carry the weight of it anymore.

How EFT can Help you Too

So why do I tell you all of this about myself? So that you can read a story that may have parallels to your own and know that your life can get better. You do not have to live in your own version of hell anymore. If you are carrying something that you don’t want to carry anymore, then you’re ready to heal that part of yourself and bring that pain to rest once and for all. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know why you are hurting or what it is from. The clarity comes from the work.

That 5-year-old, 12-year-old, 20-year-old, 50-year-old part of you that is reliving pain or trauma from your past, like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, can finally get some relief. You just have to make the choice to begin healing yourself and take action to do so. And I always recommend that you do not wander the depths of your mind alone. There are demons and zombies in there! You need a guide who has walked those dark roads before. And if you’re willing, I’d be honored to be your guide.

Feel free to take advantage of the free tapping session that I offer to see if EFT and I are a good fit for you.